Week 9: Confessions of a Scared Runaway

David (Psalm 27)

Oh my God,

Help me! My heart is beating in my chest, and I can’t even catch my breath. I’m so scared. Saul is coming for me. He wants me dead. He has so much power and backing. I just don’t know how I’ll keep away from him. He’s breathing down my neck.

I don’t sleep well, even a little sound wakes me, and then I lay awake gripping my sword, waiting for an attack. I know you’ve kept me safe in the past, I try to remember that and focus on that, but this seems completely different.

The other day when my servant girl brought me my food, I felt like she didn’t look me right in the eye. I became paranoid and made her come back and take a bite of it to make sure it wasn’t poisoned. I don’t even recognize myself anymore. I am paranoid of everyone. I don’t feel safe anywhere, and I try to read each person to see if they are trustworthy or not.

I miss the peaceful days. I long for home, for that feeling of safety and security. For someone to take care of me and for the soft sounds of bleating sheep. The rustle of the wind and the sweet music that my flock loved so much. Can I even make music anymore? Do I have anything left in my heart but dread?

Your Scared Runaway

David, my Beloved,

You are a man after my own heart. I don’t say that about just anyone. I am your rock and fortress, remember? Now you look back with fond memories of those days in the field, but don’t let your memory deceive you. Remember your early days? You were terrified, curled up by the fire, peering into the darkness searching for lions and bears, your sling getting sweaty in your palms. I provided for you and protected you. I am the God who saved you then, and I am still the God who will save you. You shake in fear at night, but you are a child of the light. Remember who you are.

I am the one who fights for you. I am your strength and shield from all that you are afraid of. It all may seem confusing and dark now, but I am working out something beautiful. You don’t have to work for my protection and love. I don’t look at anyone’s qualifications. No one can earn my love. I give it freely.

After all, what is the worst that someone can do to you? When I am yours, you have nothing to be afraid of.

So be strong and courageous. I am with you always.

God, Your Protector

(1 Samuel 13:4, Psalm 23: 4-5, John 12:36, Psalm 28:7, Heb 13:6, Deuteronomy 31:6)

Share a time you were afraid. What happened?

How has what comforts you changed over the years as you grow from a child to an adult? Ultimately, how do you take comfort in Jesus?

Read Psalm 27. David wrote this psalm when his life was in imminent danger. How can you take comfort in these words?

Psalm 27

The Lord is my light and my salvation—

    whom will I fear?

 The Lord is the strength of my life;

    of whom will I be afraid?

When those who practice evil, my enemies, and my oppressors

    come near me to devour my flesh,

        they stumble and fall.

If an army encamps against me,

    my heart will not fear.

 If a war is launched against me,

    I will even trust in that situation.

  I have asked one thing from the Lord;

    it is what I really seek:

 that I may remain in the Lord’s Temple

    all the days of my life,

 to gaze on the beauty of the Lord;

    and to inquire in his Temple.

 For he will conceal me in His shelter on the day of evil;

    He will hide me in a secluded chamber within his tent;

        He will place me on a high rock.

 Now my head will be lifted up above my enemies,

    even those who surround me.

 I will sacrifice in his tent with shouts of joy;

    I will sing and make melodies to the Lord.

Hear my voice, Lord, when I cry out!

    Be gracious to me and answer me.

 My mind recalls your word, 

    “Seek my face,”

        so your face, Lord, I will seek.

 Do not hide your face from me;

    do not turn away in anger from your servant.

 You have been my help,

    therefore do not abandon or forsake me,

        God of my salvation.

  Though my father and my mother abandoned me,

    the Lord gathers me up.

 Teach me your way, Lord,

    and lead me on a level path because of my enemies.

 Do not hand me over to the desires of my enemies;

    for false witnesses have risen up against me;

        even the one who breathes out violence.

 I believe that I will see the Lord’s goodness

    in the land of the living.

 Wait on the Lord.

    Be courageous, and he will strengthen your heart.

        Wait on the Lord!